Jump to:

• Death Lodge
• Dialogue with Death
• Practice Saying Goodbye
• Kaddish (The Mourner’s Prayer)

Death Lodge

“Imagine you are an old man or woman of an ancient nation, feeble of body, weary of soul, ready to leave this old world behind.  As your time draws nigh, you withdraw from the ordinary life of the village and go to the Death Lodge.  By doing so you signify to all that your time to die has arrived.  Your relatives and friends will all come to visit you in the Death Lodge.  This will be their last opportunity to say farewell.  As you entertain them, one by one, you say what you must say, now that you are dying.  Now, in the twilight of your life, you love them as you have never loved them before.  The unhappiness and suffering of your former life will slip away and resolve itself into bright dreams of what is to come.  Fondly, you remember the events, personages, teachers, symbols, myths, loves, inspirations, defeats, crises, and triumphs of your days.  As you reminisce, you make your final peace with the past.  You give away your things.  You make provisions for the disposal of your body.  You tie up all the loose ends.

Dying practice will bring you closer to the recognition that death is the Great Ally; that death enhances, intensifies, and gives value to life.

Excerpt from “The Trail to the Sacred Mountain: A Vision Fast Handbook for Adults”
by Steven Foster and Meredith Little.  Used with permission.
www.schooloflostborders.org
www.lostborderspress.com

Dialogue with Death

Spend time outside walking in nature.  Pay particular attention to the life and death cycles of creation.  Allow yourself to be drawn to a dead plant, leaf, or animal… to be beckoned by death.  Enter into conversation with the dead entity, asking questions like:

• What was your life like?
• What was it like to die?  Where you frightened?  Thrilled?  At peace?
• What is it like to be dead?
• What would you like me to know?
• Give thanks (via words of gratitude, a bow, or offering) to the departed spirit and continue on your journey toward death and new life.

Practice Saying Goodbye

Compose a letter to a loved one, a letter which would only be delivered at the time of your death.  In the letter, address all that you wish to communicate to this person, all that has been left unspoken, all that you wish for him/her to hear and know and believe.  Seal this letter and store in a safe space. 

Kaddish (The Mourner’s Prayer)

The traditional mourners’ prayer, known as the kaddish, magnifies and sanctifies the divine name.  We sanctify life by expanding our namings, reflecting and honoring the diversity of our lives.  We begin by silently calling to mind the names of all those whose absence we mourn.

We continue by saying aloud the names of loved ones who have died in the past year.  Mourners and those observing the anniversary of the death of a loved one say the names of those they are mourning.  Names may include lineage and terms of relation, as well as terms of endearment. 

Conclude with the recitation of Each of Us Has a Name (by Zelda)

Each of Us Has a Name

Each of us has a name
Given by the source of life
And given by our parents

Each of us has a name
Given by our stature and our smile
And given by what we wear

Each of us has a name
Given by the mountains
And given by our walls

Each of us has a name
Given by the stars
And given by our neighbors

Each of us has a name
Given by our sins
And given by our longing

Each of us has a name
Given by our enemies
And given by our love

Each of us has a name
Given by our celebrations
And given by our work

Each of us has a name
Given by the seasons
And given by our blindness

Each of us has a name
Given by the sea
And given by
Our death

Excerpt from The Book of Blessings: New Jewish Prayers for Daily Life, The Sabbath,
and the New Moon Festival by Marcia Falk.  Beacon Press, Boston. 1996